Why introverts make great escorts (without even trying)
Updated: Aug 17
I've been thinking about this tweet by my colleague Caris Cooper (@caris_cooper) the other day:
She's so right.
It's been said for ages that introverts do really well in this line of work. If you've known me or followed me for a while, you'll know how I stumbled on this job not knowing I'd love it and still doing it 6 years later. I'm incredibly lucky. Not many people can say they have a job they truly love*
Whilst I've created other career opportunities for myself over the years, I still make room for companionship. I don't think I want to give up seeing my regular gentlemen and the excitement of making new connections any time soon. Although this job is such a small part of my life now, it's proof I love what I do. Otherwise, I would've left the job to put more time into other things I have going on.
A few introverted escorts I know share the same sentiment.
But why do we introverts thrive in this job though?
Our job involves meeting many different people. Seems counterintuitive, right?
Yes, but we only meet one client at a time. Then we get to know them deeply in an intimate environment. We enjoy this.
From a cognitive perspective, introverts are typically more sensitive to external stimuli. We tend to process information more deeply, which facilitates a deeper understanding of others and fosters empathy. We're natural at this companionship thing.
On the other hand, I imagine people who generally seek out more external stimulation and enjoy larger social settings could feel under-stimulated being confined in a room with a stranger doing pretty much nothing but enjoying each other's company. They probably won't enjoy the companionship career as much. Just my theory x
What about you?
Regardless of where you are in the introvert/extrovert spectrum, if you have a demanding career, I imagine you'll be enduring external stimuli daily. That would be a bit much for anyone.
Maybe it's the endless hours of conferences and meetings. Years and years of networking to get where you are today and then countless people reaching out to you hoping to further their own careers. You can see through it all.
It never ends. Everybody wants a piece of you.
"Where's [insert your name]? We need him!"
Don't you sometimes want to get away to somewhere you don't need to be "on" all the time?
If you have a reflective brain like mine, you might want to just be with your own thoughts (with your head on my lap, my hands gently stroking your hair, with subdued background music and a good glass of wine. Sounds good?)
If you like to share what's in your head, I'd love to listen and bounce your thoughts back to you. As an introvert, I listen to understand and engage. I don't just pause when you talk so I can think of what cool responses I can come up with.
I'm also more than happy to be your sounding board. I can offer clarity, honesty, and reassurance if you need it.
Like my beloved regulars, you'll probably wonder why we have a special connection in such a short time. It's because not many people in this world are able, or willing, to make it special from the get-go. But it's easier for us introverts. We're deep people. It's our superpower.
You don't need to talk about a million things to fill the silence. Silence is okay with me. We talk when we want to. Feel free to bring up what's important to you, or not. There are so many ways to feel connected without talking. Have you ever been in the presence of someone warm and accepting of you? That's what I mean. You don't need to prove anything to me to be appreciated. Relax.
Or... maybe home is too much. What's it like there? Don't need to tell me about it if you don't want to. Just think about it. Someone too loud? Others running around? I'm sure once in a while you want to get out. How about I give you that space? I offer to softly speak to you and give you the peace you wanted, introvert style 😉**
Ready to get away? I'd love to welcome you to my peaceful world.
Text or email me x
Fun fact no. 1: I get super uncomfortable in supermarkets, especially when I have a long list of groceries to shop for. Extended exposure to people, movements, loud noises and bright lights stresses me out.
Fun fact no. 2: I can't even drive with the windows down. The noise and feel of the wind on my face drive me crazy. Nobody buys me a convertible, please. I beg you. It won't get driven.
Fun fact no. 3: I can deal with some small talk. I've trained myself to be quite good at it if I say so myself. However, it feels like noise to me and I tolerate it to get through to the meaningful stuff. A necessary evil.
Needless to say, I won't engage in small talk for the sake of small talking. It has to have something in it for me. In this job, it's getting to know somebody deeply in an intimate environment, which is heavenly for an introvert like me.
*Confession: I still have the internal struggle to fully recognise this as "work"
It's the organisation of logistics, marketing, admin and the management of finances that I consider work, but spending time with my clients? Hardly.
My rates reflect a combination of what my time is worth and my market positioning, not how hard or grueling I feel the job is.
**I didn't want to mention sex in this blog post. I don't think this is the place for it. Do you even need to read about it? I'm sure if you're just interested in me for the sex, you probably wouldn't be reading this far lol